Thursday, December 29, 2011

What the heck is "Bake a Cake"? (Part II)


The story continues …

Cotton Boy: Willie, you didn’t bake a cake, did you? I mean a real cake! This jargon or idiom must mean something else.

Willie: (weeping…) God kill me please! I was so confused and so eager to be employed. Working for the financial industry is definitely a dream job for me. Now, everything has been ruined; everything was destroyed because of my stupidity.

Cotton Boy: Willie, we, Chinese, in general, don’t know how to bake cakes or cookies. We don’t grow up with this tradition. Who taught you? And what sort of cake did you make by the way?

Willie: I called friends to help, watched Youtube videos and searched for on-line recipes of how to make a blackforest cake with cherry icing on top. I spent hours to learn, to mix all the ingredients and to bake it. Though the bottom of the cake was burnt a bit, it is still delicious. Cotton Boy, I am eating the cake now.

Cotton Boy: Are you alright? Didn’t they take your cake? What is going on? What is the true meaning behind of “Bake a Cake”? Tell me the entire story, please stop eating your cake while talking to me and quit whimpering! Be a MAN!

Willie: Yes! Yes! Yes! In financial world, “Bake a Cake” means as follows:

“This term is mostly used on public companies which have a particular stock index in the market. Before any companies release a quarter or an annual financial report to the public whether it is a surplus or deficit, the companies will try to minimize any sudden fluctuation affecting the price of a stock. They will be seeping the news to the market bit by bit. This act is called “Bake a Cake”. For example, if a company's earnings are large for a particular quarter, the company or its financial consulting firm may leak the information so that investors bake it into the cake, reducing the pressure for an unsustainable jump in price when the earnings are actually announced. This allows the markets to gradually adjust before the announcement. It is more formally called discounting the news.”

Willie: The secretary, the manager and the VP were speechless when they saw the cake. I even carried a plastic knife and some paper plates to serve them. The VP said he was impressed and claimed that I was very nice and authentic. They laughed; I laughed. All became mocking. The VP hurriedly wrapped up the interview and walked me out to the meeting room with a statement, “We will contact you after the decision is made.” I was holding the half uncut cake disappointedly, entered the elevator and punched the “G” button. Fortunately enough, there was not an open window. If I had found one at that moment, I would have surely jumped out of it to kill myself.”

Cotton Boy: What the heck? I am so sorry to hear that, Willie. It is their loss not to hire you. Forget everything and be prepared for the next one. At least, you know how to bake a cake now.

Willie: COTTON BOY!!! (yelling, screaming and shouting … blah, blah, blah)